While it's true I don't know apple (from a user experience), I do know business. One great truth in business is that great service requires great profit. With that in mind, and relative to the markup on apple hardware, shouldn't they be coming to your house? Except for the fact that they have you locked in, so aside from the competition from the likes of google and others, they would probably/eventually tell you to go f yourself. Fact is apple has you coming and going, and everywhere in between as best they can. You never own a apple product, it owns you.
The OP's problem seems to be Asus quality control more than google's customer support. Google doesn't have people locked in to their "profit area" (music, movies, apps, etc.. from the playstore) like apple and itunes. Plus sam's and asus are the seller's here (as in they saw the profit from the hardware). It would be like buying a nexus/apple phone at sam's club, popping a straight talk sim in it and calling straght talk when your phone broke. Google just try's to offer a good enough service that you will buy from them, as apposed to locking you in. Keep in mind also that if it had worked as planned, you would only be able to buy your I-apple at a apple store.
My experience with the play store is that they're new at this, but trying. I haven't been on hold on the phone for long periods and they respond to emails with in minutes most times (depending on what day/time it is). They are sending a new one to me first (advance replacement, they put a hold on your credit card like is done when you buy gas, but do not charge it) and I have 21 days to return the old one. All free of charge.
Don't get me wrong, google is not some panacea of love and caring, far from it. They too are after profits as all companies should be. But they are doing it via customer service, or in other words building a better mouse trap. As oppose to trying to create a monopoly to where the customer takes what we give them because they have no other choice. Which is how it would be if everyone bought apple....