Best forum ever! Thanks everyone for your help. Hope 12/15 is the day.
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At allegedly great risk the guy none of us knew told us something that was pretty much common knowledge!
It's all right guys. OP is the dude that lets the feral cat that my cat talks to, when it poops outside the VZW store, live underneath his porch. From this thread.
Obviously feral cat is right about this, and is being pursued by VZW to keep his mouth shut. My cat said feral cat was skipping town for a few days to let the heat die down. OP is probably under pressure to reveal his whereabouts so feral cat can undergo enhanced interrogation.