To the contacts part, I know that on the Original Droid you could filter contact by whether or not there was a phone number. That was in display options in contacts. You still can still get contacts' email etc but they won't show when you're trying to dial a phone number.
For the Facebook part, I had facebook sync turned off(also on the OD) and none of my facebook friends are in my contacts, only google contacts with phone numbers show.
Not an option on this version... I think when you're in the dialer it only shows contacts that have phone numbers, but with 1,300+ facebook friends, a lot of them had phone numbers listed.
I ended up doing a hard reset on my phone actually... I was trying to remove my facebook account and it wouldn't let me. I didn't re-add it after the wipe.
For the contacts, I have two google accounts- one personal gmail account (which was what i was using) as well as a work account which i access 99% of the time via mail on my mac, so none of the contacts were in gmail. what i did was I added the contacts I wanted (that were on My Contacts on my personal gmail account) to the contacts on my work and only sync the contacts with the work account.
The downside of all this is I no longer have facebook pictures/statuses syncing to my phonebook, but my phonebook/contacts are so much more responsive and my battery life (which was a huge beef I had) has improved dramatically. I attribute this to the phone not constantly syncing facebook statuses and photos for 1,300+ people.