Google Fiber borks system updates...no, really

[dookie.]

Couldn't get 14 to start onboarding, despite it showing available. I'm on Google Fiber. I, uh, Googled it and found this...

Others w/same & fix.

I'm "AintNothinSweet" in that thread. Put up my VPN connection and all is good. I'm sure the mobile network would have worked too, but my reception is lousy where I am at the moment. Very weird...