I had this problem when I first bought my Droid X coming from a BB Storm 2. I end up getting an app called Bedside (Night Clock) from Daniel Velazco. Basically what it does is only allow the phone ringer to be herd at night, and wont let any notification or emails sounds to play. On my Blackberry I had the stock "bedside mode" and when I plugged it in, it automatically did this for me. With my Droid X I just plug the phone in, and when I'm ready to go to sleep for the night I click the button and no more noise. Instead of turning data off, I never hear that I received them, and they are waiting for me in the AM. They do have an automatic setting as well, but I like to just turn it on when I'm done playing around for the night.
It has good customization and has served me well. If I understand your request then I think this is what your looking for.
EDIT - Just realized that OP may have ditched Android's all together, but hopefully someone else can use that information. I didn't see the older date since it had been dug up in the last few days.