Curious, have you always used a large device? To date I've only kept using phones that are more on the small one handed use size. Do you find the Pixel XL to be too big? I'm undecided whether to go for the larger screen and battery for the additional $80. How is the screen quality? Reviews say it has lower resolution than the smaller 3A. Also what color did you get? I'm considering purplish just for the heck of getting something completely different than the "boring" black.
The resolution is the same between the 3a and 3a XL --- both are 2220 x 1080. The XL has less pixel density -- the 2220x1080 is spread over a 6" display, rather than a 5.6" display, so the 3a has 441 ppi (pixels per inch) compared to the XLs 401 ppi. It is unlikely you'll be able to see the difference.
The battery life is nice on the XL but the 3A battery should easily last a full day; of course, it still will somewhat depend on how you use your phone.
Personally, I got the white XL, I like the look (and the orange power button). The purple-ish is a nice looking phone, I think it is a great choice. If you prefer smaller phones, I'd likely go with the 3A -- though I'd recommend going into a store and holding both, see how they feel in your hand. Then buy the one that feels and looks the best to you.