The regular Facebook for android did not come installed on my captivate
so how can I sync contacts and other things that are done automatically on other Droids
Each vendor (Motorola, HTC, Samsung, etc) puts their own skin on the phones, including widgets to handle contacts. I think Samsung has FRIENDSTREAM which I have heard good things about (I am not a Facebook user so no usage myself).
If looks like it should be a two-step process. First, as noted above, make sure you have your Facebook account entered into ACCOUNTS AND SYNC main menu. There should be sync settings for this account once you set it up.
Once that is done, go into your CONTACTS and hit the MENU there. Make sure you are not displaying PHONE/GMAIL only. You should be able to select which contacts are shown, which are linked, etc. It sounds like you either do not have the account setup in the main, or are not displaying your FB contacts from inside Contacts.
I just noticed how old the original post was. Who has been gravedigging?