Wow. "Girl terms" haha... That's just wrong, dude. They might be crazy but they sure as hell aren't dumb. Most of them are smarter than us.
Men and women definitely tend to have different interests and if online tech forums are any indication, women seem less interested than men in rooting and jailbreaking their phones.
I'm also considering Android vs. iOS for my mom and it's a touch choice. My smartphone path was 9530 -> 9550 -> DInc -> iP4 -> TB.
Screen size: TB, much easier to see.
Battery: iP4, no WAY is my mom gonna want to carry/swap a spare battery, open the phone, etc.
Keyboard: NEITHER, she'd much rather have a physical keyboard but the ones on BBs are too small
Apps: TB, way more free Apps for Andoird, she's not paying for an App. Ever.
GUI: iOS. It's just simpler. Not easier or better, just simpler.
NAV: Android, no contest.
Voice Recognition: Android, no contest.
Data: TB, for the chance to have grandfathered unlimited 4G @ $30/mo. when everyone else goes to tiered pricing.
I think the choice for my mom would be the Merge, if they ever effin release it already. Large screen, physical keyboard and presumably good battery life. I'd root it, strip the bloat, possibly de-Sense and streamline it nice, clear and simple for her.
If the iP4 had a larger screen and physical keyboard, I'd give her that.
If BB had a larger, slider landscape keyboard, that'd also be something to consider.
Just my thinking based on what I know of my mom's phone usage...
Good luck!