ive tried everything and pretty much every method and im just at a loss. i mean im not new to this, ive rooted and changed roms on my droid plenty of times and to other friends droids, ive changed OSs on my previous blackberries more times than i can count. But this incredible is proving to be an incredible problem for me. i find myself having to give up and just waiting for a concrete method. =*(
persistence will pay off! i was in the same boat as you, it's not a question of ability, skill, or knowledge with this phone and the current method, simply a matter of timing, the window to access adb in recovery is very small.
for me, what seemed to work was the 2gb pny (black packaging) airplane mode (doubtful as to how much [if any] that helped, but might as well mention)
the computer i ended up doing it on (i wasn't home) didn't have speakers to hear the disconnect sound, so i had device manager open, about 1 second after the phone dissapeared from there, and basically right as i hear the weird sound the phone makes right before the /!\ screen i clicked in the sd card.
then i just typed in adb shell about 10 times (if i had to guess, about 5-8 seconds of it) and it would say device not found and then the last time there was a couple second pause and then i got the magical error.
once you get in (and you will with enough patience) the other tip i have is if you miss the timing for the payload update, you have to push the ota.zip over again before you try the payload.
good luck, you can do it!
