Just a follow up, after a couple of days of fumbling around, uninstalling, reinstalling, swapping drivers and so on I finally had an aha! moment. I looked to see if the AndroidHTCSync.apk file was on my M8 and sure enough it was. So I emailed to myself, then dropped it into the M9 and the computer recognized the phone within seconds. So in my case it was that the file itself was either corrupted or did not get a good install at the factory? It is a little weird that if this particular file was so important to sync that you would think it would be available more easily for download. Maybe it is, but if it is I couldn't find it very easily. I have no idea if there are issues with this model in general or just my particular device. I really liked the M8 a lot which is why I got the M9. But this M9 is giving me heartache. I feel sad.